Why Your Partner Responds With, “I Don’t Know…”

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I don't know

As a therapist, my least favorite answer to a question is probably “I don’t know…”.  I mean I always think (rather critically), Really?  You don’t know?  Yes you do.  You’re in your head, not me.  Just tell me!  As I’ve been thinking about this more I’ve realized that I have the same response to my husband when he gives me non-answers like “Where do you want to go to eat?” “I don’t know, you pick.”, “How are you feeling about this?” “I don’t know.”, “Did I hurt your feelings?” “I don’t know.”, “I just told you how upset I am about all of this, don’t you have any response?” “I don’t know.”.  I’ve always been frustrated and a little impatient with it, whether it’s in my own marriage or in my relationship with clients in the therapy room because I don’t understand “not knowing” how you’re feeling.  I usually have about a thousand ways to express what I’m thinking and feeling!


Here’s what I didn’t know about “I don’t know.”.  It’s true!  They don’t know!  Earth-shattering, right?  But truly, they really don’t know in ... Read more »

A Guide to Mental Health Counselors for Dummies

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Mental Health for Dummies, Therapist

Are you having serious relationship difficulty and struggling to find out who the right person is to turn to? There are so many different types of therapists out there and most people have no idea who to go to if they need help.  Odds are that if you ever saw a therapist, you just called him/her a “shrink” and left it at that.  But did you know that there are different types of therapists who are trained in and specialize in very different and specific areas?  Here’s the 411 on how to decide who to look for when the need arises.



These are typically going to be the most expensive, because they’ve gone through med school and have the ability to prescribe medicine for mental health concerns.  In fact, that’s their specialty – prescribing! (Which is why seeing a psychiatrist for psychotropic medications is often a better decision than seeing your family doctor).  Most psychiatrists don’t do therapy or counseling because it’s not their specialty.**



Psychologists don’t have the ability to prescribe medicine, but they have been trained on how to diagnose ... Read more »